Marriage (a great lover and a true forgiver)

"jadi ko bila lagi?"

my boss asked me this question today.

as today our ward actually received two wedding invitation from other wards. 

and one of our staff (the youngest staff) was married 2 weeks ago.
now, i get the title the oldest single female staff in my ward.

"shery, ko bila mau kawin?"

"jangan kasi lama bah, mau jalan-jalan di kota belud ni"

"bah kad kau lagi ni kami tunggu-tunggu"

i am turning 25 this year and if you're 25, female and single (belum kahwin maksud saya arr..), this question should be very familiar to you.

a month ago, my boss told me

"perempuan paling sesuai kahwin masa umur 25. tidak terlalu muda dan tidak terlalu tua"

few of my workmate told me weeks ago

" 25 is the most suitable age to get children. subur."

orang kampung saya bilang,

"sudah ada kerja bah, apa lagi mau tunggu, kahwin saja"

grandmas in my village keep saying.

"bah, kumawin noh toruhai, kokito poh daa diya dot kumawin ti noh"

"kawin cepat-cepat, supaya kami sempat tengok kau kahwin"

i been asked the some question over and over again since i started working in 2012.

i don't hate them for asking me the questions because honestly, i also keep asking myself the exact same question, over and over too.

"WHEN WILL I ACTUALLY GONNA GET MARRY?"

i mean i am 25 this year, kalau dulu-dulu 5 orang anak sudah bilang nenek saya.

but before i could really answer this question another question pop-out in my head.

'am i ready for a marriage?'

jeng-jeng-jeng

25 years old, not too old and not too young, good timing for having children, have a job.

with all the advantages i have above, am i qualified enough for a marriage?

i don't know much about marriage, but for me marriage a big deal.

it's the first step you take to the new phase of your life. 

and the new phase is not just about you alone anymore.

you gonna have to share it with the one you've chosen to grow old with.

and they said, growing old with someone is much more different than growing up with your sisters or brother.

you need to be a great lover and a true forgiver.

i know i will have to go through that phase someday.

but maybe not now.

 i am pretty sure i am not a true forgiver. 

not yet at least.

 and yes, of course i am walking forward to it, but why the rush?

i mean, takkan lari jodoh dikejar kan.

so, i decided to enjoy every step that i take toward it.

*to all my 'great lover and true forgiver' friends out there, i really admire you guys!

i was lucky my parent didn't like to interfere with my love life.

especially my mom.

she told me once that she don't have to lecture me about what should i do with my life because when the right times comes, it will happen eventually.

thank you ma. 

muah muah!

p/s,

"jadi ko bila lagi?"

"palan-palan bah boss. keke"

XOXO,

l i l i e j o h n